Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Some Day My Prince Will Come, But Am I Cinderella?

I want a good man. A man that has money. A man that has his stuff together. I want him to drive a nice car, have a good job, and have a beautiful home. I don't want any "baby mama drama."

How often have we heard these very comments? My question is, how worthy is the individual that is making these requests. Many time we as women are very clear about what we want in a man, but are we the type of woman that deserves this type of man?

Wait! Before you answer, think about this. Would you continue to have a separate account that he doesn't know about so that if things don't work out you can make a clean break? Would you feel as though he was controlling you rather than just concerned when he asks where you're going and when you'll be home?

Well, the fact of the matter is, that many of us are so blinded by the wedding that we forget about the marriage and all of the "stuff" that goes with it. Instead of looking for all of the materialistic, superficial reasons to get married, why don't we focus on the more meaningful characteristics that will last a lifetime. Is the man responsible? Does he love you? Is he trustworthy? These are the qualities that will last. Money, jobs, and looks will come and go but pride, respectability, and love are mainstays.

We should spend our time preparing ourselves for marriage rather than the wedding. We should stop limiting ourselves when it comes to possible prospects for marriage. If we are truly as independent as we say we are, then we don't need a man to provide material things for us anyway.

Each person in the relationship should enter the relationship as a whole person. Not as one seeking to be completed. If this is the case, then the marriage will never work. You must also make yourself approachable. No one, not even other women want to be in the company of someone that always has to broadcast their accomplishments in order to hold a conversation. This is not only shallow it is boring. You should have more facets to yourself than what you do.

The bottom line is, work on yourself. Get yourself ready for a relationship first and the rest will come . Use this time to make yourself complete and then your Prince Charming will come.

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